Nostalgia

I’m going to Germany. I am quite attached to my computer, most especially videos and photos and music and information. Which takes up space. I have always been this way, which is why about 4-5 years ago, I bought myself a nice little external hard drive. 250 gigs. Excruciatingly heavy. Quite outdated. Yesterday, considering my previously stated going-to-Germany, I decided it would be quite prudent to invest in a new 500GB mini/portable hard drive (one of those cute little Western Digital passport ones) so that I could ACTUALLY bring it with me to Germany, and it could hold all of my stuff. Or digital stuff at least.

So I have begun going through all of my photos and videos and files–including several flowery “letters” written to people at various important junctures in my relationships…some of which were sent, others not. It’s interesting to see what I wrote. I thought I was so…smart. And I was. Just not in the ways I thought I was. I was certainly both mature and also a bit precocious. It’s funny looking back though…I just thought I knew so much about life. And I don’t entirely think I was wrong, I was just so young…funny how that works. I’m still young. I’m still somewhat precocious. I think I just realize it a bit more now…I think.

Anyway, on that note, I’m heading to Germany. Mid-September, if all goes smoothly, my “things” (what little I have that I won’t be bringing along) will be tucked away somewhere in Chapel Hill and I will be on a plane, perhaps at some point a train, to Krefeld, Germany to live with a family who has 2 boys, aged 3 & 6. I will be working with them 4 days a week in the afternoons/evenings and taking German lessons and traveling the rest of the time. If I can figure out how, I will volunteer in some kind of medical/clinical setting, or tutor English. Or something interesting to occupy my time and DO something useful besides help a family raise its children. Perhaps I will read, if I can find books in English. We shall see. I am so ready for the adventure I cannot even begin to describe it. Life has become mundane and I have actually sort of enjoyed the laid-backness; I’m looking forward however to being in a land seeped in history, with people who are aware of the importance of remembering it. I will be moving from the most prominent symbol of the future and hope and possibility to a place where people are unable to escape the grasp of history–both its incredible heights as well as its deep dark underbellies. I am so excited to explore that. And I believe it will be a truly interesting dynamic–coming from so recently being a part of this bizarre place where people come to seek their fortunes…I think that it makes such a huge difference in how people actually live daily, which may seem strange. But it perhaps has something to do with expectations?

I’m also looking forward to getting to learn a new language and all of the linguistic fun that comes along with that. My dorkage comes out in my hopes for this trip…truly. Examining history and linguistics outside the world of academia? But also I believe quite an honest representation of myself. I also hope to meet a lot of interesting people from all over the world, both other travelers and dwellers of the lands I’ll be visiting. Exciting! I have no idea really what the year will hold. I can only know that in a year, I will look back and be in awe, one way or the other. Either because I just cannot realize now what kinds of crazy/lack of crazy things will happen, or because it was exactly as I thought it would be. Whatever. I’m getting annoying. I haven’t written for a while, I’m getting too philosophical.

But my overall point is that I’m excited!! And I especially can’t wait to share the adventure here, because I’m sure there will be a lot to share. I’m sure some things will be rambly, like this. Others will hopefully be a bit more interesting/informative/story-like. We shall see.